Have you ever experienced a moment of peace and relaxation in your life, where you feel so joyful, singing to the Lord, or meditating on His goodness? That moment may not even be a long one. For instance, you might have experienced a brief peaceful moment in the Lord, whether it is when you are at work and there are no rude customers or at home when the kids are in school. If you work at a restaurant, you have no ticket orders flying in your face, no boss stepping into the room to ask you to do anything, and no husband telling you to go pick up or drop off things at the in-laws. Have you ever been in the middle of a peaceful and joyful solo moment, then somebody said something, or you received a call that completely interrupted your peace? Or maybe someone just steps into the room and destroys the whole atmosphere with what they say to you.
I have discovered that those precious moments don’t have to end because someone else steps into the room and says something rude, or because we answer a phone call that we shouldn’t have. Since Jesus said in John 14:27, “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid,” therefore, the world can’t take away our peace unless we allow it.
Too often, we allow others to interrupt our peace and joy. We respond quickly with the intention of getting back to that place of peace after our response, only to realize that we can’t get back to it right away. Sometimes, just one unnecessary response can quickly lead you to an unexpected altercation that could have been avoided. Therefore, we are going to expand on this a little bit to see how we can better maintain our peace and joy.
Generally, when someone speaks to you, an I.C.E. is thrown at you. I call it I.C.E. because when someone speaks to you, it can either be an Insult, a Correction/ advice, or an Encouragement. Regardless of what it is, you’ll need to take a minute to identify which one is thrown at you. Is it an insult? Is it a correction? Or is it a word of Encouragement? Take a minute to assess and ask yourself which one of the three it is before you respond. This step may seem foolish, but it is essential because it will determine how you respond and save you time and energy over the things that don’t even deserve your response. Remember, your primary goal is peace, or even better, maintaining peace. Though it is easier said than done, your primary concern in this process is ‘correction’ because God can send someone your way to correct you, and you don’t want to miss that because you don’t want to repeat the same test. Therefore, you need to look for corrections or advice. If it is a word of encouragement, you can keep it and give all the glory to God. However, if it is an insult, don’t even bother, because it is not worth your time and energy.
You need to overlook insults and pay them no mind because you already know that insults are peace destroyers, so bypass them. Act as if you didn’t hear a thing. I know it isn’t an easy thing to do, but it’s doable. The more you practice, the easier it gets.
If the correction comes with disrespect or in a condescending way, take a deep breath, then take the good and reject the bad. You don’t have to engage with the bad before you reject it, but simply reject it. Engaging with it will not do you any good; it can even prevent you from seeing the good part of the correction. Also, you don’t have to be all lovey-dovey with the person who is disrespectfully correcting you. In fact, they don’t even have to know that you’ve taken the advice or the correction from them, and that doesn’t mean you are being prideful. Pride is when a person respectfully corrects you, yet you still reject the correction because you don’t like their forehead or because of your own opinion of them, meaning you think you are better than them or they don’t have anything they can teach you. Now, that’s pride.
Also, what you must not forget is that God can do whatever pleases Him with whomever He wants. Sometimes, God will allow you to learn from your enemies. So, He will place you in a situation where you will have no other choice but to learn from someone who you know doesn’t love you. However, the twist to this is that if you humble yourself and endure that tough moment, the same God will lift you in the presence of that enemy after you’ve suffered a while, and your enemy won’t be able to do a thing about it. God says, “The King’s heart is in the hand of the Lord, like the rivers of water, He turns it wherever He wishes.” Proverbs 21:1
Also, I have discovered that it is okay to ask people to repeat themselves as you try to identify which part of the I.C.E. is thrown at you. Sometimes, people may make you feel some kind of way when you politely ask them to repeat what they’ve said to you. They may even label you as someone slow, or whatever label they want to give you. Nonetheless, at the end of the day, you know what you are looking for. The reasons behind what you do have nothing to do with their opinions. And remember that the goal is to maintain your peace, and the rest is history.
If God is for you, who can be against you! You got this!
SCRIPTURES
“Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and His ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” 1 Peter 3:10-12
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” Matthew 5:9
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